A better friend

With much happening of late, it makes me wishing from inside that I have been a better friend. A friend who sends that promised mail, checks up the troubled pal, says the needful prayer.


It's not about being popular or building a presence. Something simple as being there for someone, like many others who have stood by me even before I asked them to.

*****

My blogger friend lost her darling Airedale Maggie today. It feels like I've lost a friend too. I haven't been able to check up on them lately, so the sad news just hit me somewhat hard and sudden.


I hope I do not miss caring for another friend again. For a change I hope I'll grow to be a better giver than just a receiver.


Thank you for sharing the marvel of your life there Maggie, you'll be missed. My deepest thoughts with you Sue.

Where are you?

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I don't know how time passes so quickly ever since my return from Singapore...


I'm pretty pleased with how I'm clearing stuffs even before my wrist is healed to a comfortable stage. Sadly, it's a reality too that there are aspects left to neglect.


Like the blog... You know, the cub is the one and only I may ever have my lifetime. So for every milestone reached or wonder he showed me, I've made mental notes to post them but failed to do so.


I've received presents and cards sent by kind folks all the way from Singapore, England, Taiwan and Australia, but I haven't take time to thank one by one though I wish I've done so. Why haven't I? Really!!!


Maybe I need an hour, just an hour that allows me to catch some sleep, finish the chores, catch up with friends, clear my mailbox. But where do I find that hour? I'm interupted 3 times when writting this.


If money can't buy me time, fine. How about some human-use battery? The kind that makes one go on and on and on like the Energiser Bunny.


Something very undesirable happened... I think I may have lost one, or even more miserably; two long time friends... Friends for almost 20 years. Just like that. With a snap of the finger. Boom! She's gone.


I swear I do not know the reason behind her vanishing without a word, and for the first few hours I was worried if something has happened to her. But you know, a cold shoulder isn't too hard to detect, the chill reaches me despite the distance.


It's not like we had a fight or anything close, our last words were we're dying to meet each other. It's not like someone bitched behind me and things got marred. It's not about a broken promise, a lie, or betrayal. A little voice tells me that I'll never know the reason my lifetime.


But I respect her decision to throw our 20 years away though it hurts with every heartbeat. I admit that I couldn't even make time to poke her. Maybe she felt neglected. Maybe...


Where you are, A? Give me a word, I just want to know that you're alright, nothing else matters. I won't even ask why. :(

*****

I'd like to leave a word for all blogger friends who are staying around with your encouragement. Things are inevitably tight for an imperfect person who's trying to put things right... You know I'll come back to you.

Happy 2012

This year, I'm wishing for peace around the world, and may God's abundant grace overflows. May that the world be a better place to live in, a little voice reminds me of my daily responsiblities and shoulds. So I'm starting with the man in the mirror, cos I have a little one mirroring me now.


The blog is 4 :) And through it I've befriended some sweetest personalities whom I count as my blessings. All you wonderful people who have cared for us in 2011, thank you so much!


May 2012 be an extremely great year for everybody!

Home for Christmas

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Greetings! From Japan.


We actually flew back home a week ago, for reasons better forgotten, but our bags packed with toys and hearts full of joy. We're reunited with papa for this very special year end, our first Christmas, and first New Year together.


So all is good, and God is good for bringing us back so that we could celebrate the little guy who is another 6 months to a year old!


The cub was the apple of so many eyes then... my family, friends and even strangers. I was a proud mama throughout my stay in Singapore, my trophy, medal and prize lie in him. I've probably finally understood why people love to have kids?





At 5 months, the playful one was rolling over like a pro. I knew it, he looooves attention and is a big show off. He teased my family so much that everybody hurried home to catch their superstar. My brother must forgive me for posting this, know how much the cub liked it high on his uncle's shoulders. They are just too cute together!


I was most touched when my outrageously playful one was good throughout both flights, and even having passengers who couldn't resist him coming over to play. My eyes warmed when an Irish old lady praised and blessed him, these very warm-hearted people were too kind to an almost crippled mom struggling with a infant on the 7 hours flight.






I know you feel me when I say I'm thanking God for keeping the good spirits in my boy throughout those hours. :)






Someone may be right about me thinking too much for my little one is constantly in a good mood. True, but Mr. Sunshine has his Achilles' heel too. See what I mean.













And he means it.


Now into 6 months, I think I'm going grey if he's not going to love his semi-solids soon. HE~LP!!

*****

It's Christmas tomorrow, the birthday of our Savior, who came just as helpless as any babe in the world. As I carressed my little one and ponder upon the many miracles and blessings in my life... who am I, to have Him come and give... I can't really put into words, but the story of Nativity just touches me anew, again.


Blessed Christmas everyone, wherever you are, know that His blessings have never left you. May the beautiful spirit of Christmas fills your heart and home.

How many days...

To Christmas did you say?? I've been so dazed with so much late happenings that I'm missing all the fun of my favorite day.

*****

A surgery is carried out successfully on my left wrist 4 weeks ago, and now the fella has forgotten how to rotate, bend or twist freely. It is recovering little by little, but surely, and a complete healing is just a matter of time. It's been so long that I'm able to carry my baby with ease again. :)

We're extending our stay in Singapore until February of the brand new year. I do have some concerns though cos my family members simply dote on my little one too much, I can't imagine returning Japan with a spoilt brat. :(

I know, I know. They can't help themselves. Even strangers love him.

Well, I guess it'll be good to siam ( Singapore slang ; avoid ) winter for a wee bit.

I'm not forgetting everyone who have cared about my condition. All the concern, emails, and follow-ups, thank you so much! Things were hard for quite a while, but kind people like you have made days bearable.

Going home

In another 3 days, I'll be travelling with my 4 months old on a 7 hour flight home.


It isn't an easy decision. I worry about how the cub will cope with his first flight in his tender months, I guess it's why I'm not too thrilled about the trip this time.





The medical sectors in Japan aren't helping me, so I'm making a hopeful trip back for surgery on my wrists which are about to give way anytime soon. This Tendonitis has been tormenting me for years and been most unbearable the past months. I've been clenching my teeth so hard that I may lose them soon.


Looking back I couldn't have survived the past months with 2 bad wrists and an active baby without a new supply of grace granted to me day by day. Sniff...


Now I just need to pull through the flight, hoping that my fella stays his sweet self. After the surgery, I may not be able to use the keyboard for quite a while so catch up later everyone! Meanwhile, stay good and blessed.

At 4 months

4 months have passed and we're still calling our little thing 'Breadcrumbs'. We use this cute icon conveniently whenever we text about the cub.




















The 7300 grams of Breadcrumbs flips over with little help, and lunges himself forward as if he's ready to crawl.


His baby vowels have increased so much and it's really hilarious when he babbles non stop. He is starting to laugh and giggle aloud.


He has the most generous smiles and very friendly to strangers too.


I love it most when he looks at me affectionately and wraps his little fingers around mine.






Of course there are hair pulling moments like how he pulls his own hair and everybody elses, but he quickly makes up with his cute self.






At the mention of hair, I'm getting really scared as I'm shedding like autumn. Also, losing weight at an exponential rate too.. I didn't gain too much pregnancy weight to begin with due to the morning sickness slash, so it's all showing on my hollow cheeks and I'm looking as if I'm having morning sickness all over again.





It's a mixture of feelings whenever I bring the baby to the mirror, there he is all smooth and soft while I've never looked more haggard and tired.


It sounds great to look like a radiant mom holding my baby, but really I won't dwell too much on what's beyond my control. I'll be really happy though if I can just spend this winter cold-free.

The Anniversary

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Today is when we celebrate our wedding held in Japan 7 years ago.


I wrote about the same day last year, and named the post 'The Anniversary'.


What I didn't tell in the post back then, I was 5 days late by the anniversary day.


I didn't want to think too much about it for afterall it was the first time we tried. To be sure, I got my kit that morning and that's how all that cramping, headache and bloating explained.


I remember my feelings back then with so much detail that my eyes are warm with the same happy tears right now. :)


And so I had a surprise ready for Bear at our anniversary dinner! I was impatient throughout the slow meal as I couldn't wait for dessert, that's when I would pass him the kit ~ Happy Anniversary honey, I have a present for you. ;)


’本当に？’ he said. Yes honey, I know it all seems very orchestrated but yes, you are becoming a daddy soon!


But I remember telling him too that we may be rejoicing too soon as my age is a factor, and my health hasn't been too good since I've started living in Japan.

*****

This year, there are 3 of us at the dining table. Bear and I had our favorite pizza, the little one watched on curiously and was foaming like a crab. It's ok we didn't make it to any place fascinating. Happiness has never been nearer next to the one you love. :)



Thank you God, for every single blessing.